just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
