Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
