There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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