And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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