love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
