I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize