I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Can I color on your dick again?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
