shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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