your room smells of hookers.
And success
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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