no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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