Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
