He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Brb crying the tears of my youth
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
