idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
