in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
