I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Found the puke drawer
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
