When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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