I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
