i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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