you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
