i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
