Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Pants are for mortals
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
