Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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