FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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