i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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