I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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