Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
