Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Lo siento on account of my penis...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
