it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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