I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
