Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
