Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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