yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
