It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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