I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
