if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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