Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
