I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
