She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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