He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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