i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
