I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
You took a bar mat shot.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
