Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Randomize
