im having a threesome with these popsicles
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
