But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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