Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
