I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
then he tried to convert me to islam
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
