I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
