Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I deserve to be covered in dicks
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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