David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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