i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize