so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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