At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
