Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
